The Minikin Incarnadine Cowl-Titivated Gamine,

or

Little Red Riding Hood

E

rewhile there existed a jejune hoyden, who had secured the veneration of all, even those who had espied her for merely a singular discrete trice.  Her consanguinities comprehended, among others, an enate predecessor, possessing the prosaic appellation of grandmother, and via the largess of this clement crone, she procured a Lilliputian capote, with a most vermilion capuche, whence her winsome sobriquet, "Little Red Riding Hood", was so engendered.  

One particular chronological interval, the materfamilias impelled her to convey a dosser, replete with alible pabulum and potations, to her matrilineal predecessor, forasmuch as, through her valetudinarian state, the somatic condition of the aforementioned octogenarian was compromised to the point of her being enervated and impuissant.  Ergo, her being was delimited to the supine position.  The vinaceous-bedaubed scion acquiesced extempore, and forthwith embarked on her entrustment.  

  The itinerary of the peregrination was ventured in the most ratiocinative manner via the weald, and the duration of said voyage rarely necessitated the minute indicator of an analog timepiece to sweep an entire one hundred and eighty degree arc. Upon the ingress of this sylvan milieu, the bairn discerned a pileous quadruped  bearing similitude to and being an antecessor of the beloved Canis familiaris.  

    Incognizant of the formidable degree to which this particular hispid miscreant was iniquitous and flagitious, the ingénue intuited not even a modicum of disquietude or trepidation upon this fortuitous happenstance. 

        "Exemplary fulgent segment of the diurnal period," he asseverated.

        "Salutations," came the repartee.  

"Where wend you?" the inimical rapscallion catechized.         

I'm actualizing a brief sojourn at the residence of my anile cognate and am consigning to her savorous viands."

        "May I inquire as to the locus of this purlieu?" 

        "Indubitably. At the terminus of this path, the localization of which is far from onerous."        

        Subsequent to uttering a vocalization of valedictory, the caitiff retroceded into the aphotic boscage.       

Following this compendious confabulation, the dolman- bedecked Adamite absquatulated with the utmost celerity.  The odious knave tarried a trice, cogitating and machinating, thence compassed a Mephistopelian cabal.  Being a denizen of this arboreal pale, he was cognizant of a deoppilated route to the aforecited domicile, whereas the quiddity of the trajectory elected by the soubrette was forsooth, though facile, labyrinthine.  

Hence the crinite reprobate arrived at the grisard's habitacle ere the callow perigrinator and rapped at the portal. 

        "Who fustigates the janua with such formidability?!" the residentiary suspired tremulously.

        "Your consanguinean," the dissembling varlet prevaricated.

        "Thence, convey your entity into this abode, for I am effete and encouched due to my decumbiture."      

The predacious malfeasant irrupted and proceeded to ingurgitate the hoary dowager.  The abominable scalawag donned the ultrafidian annuitant's nocturnal habiliments, which included a voluminous tuque, and ensconced himself in the Ogygian mackabroin’s somnifery.  
 Anon, the guileless juvencle divulgated her arrival.  Apprehending her presence extrinsic to the edifice, the permicious reprobate enjoined her to transpose her corporeity to within the confines of the plebeian bower.  Upon ingression, the affrighted chit skirled, "enigmatical predecessor, what brobdignagian auditory apparati protuberate from your poll!"  "For effective auscultation of your parlance, my cosset," the palterer elucidated.  

         "Anomalastic primogenitor, what prodigious ocular orbs goggle from your physiognomy," she averred.

        "The more efficient to descry your homuncular form with punctilious exactitude, my minion," he enucleated.

        "Sphingine antecedent, what cyclopean extremities you possess," she opined.

        "To embosom you adroitly, my progeny," he explicated.

        "Theriantropic harridan, what elephantine denticles permeate your oral orifice," the brephic numquid adduced.       

        "The more efficacious to gourmandize your sapid corporeal substantiality, my gobbet," he vociferated, and with an expeditious gambado the maleficent dastard manducated the woebegone tellurian.  Surfeited, the scelerate picaro summarily dossed.  

        Propitiously, a beneficent  nimrod was perambulating vicinally, and perceived the imbroglio.  Carked, the perspicacious paladin transpierced the chaumière and perused the corpulent, oscitant pariah.  Conning the exigency of the conjuncture with sapient perspicuity, the intrepid factotum erepted his allagrugous poniard, anatomized the execrable varlet, and disenthralled the felicitous duo, then the adjutorious stalwart jugulated the inimical malefactor.  Thereupon, the three beamish symposiasts roistered, banqueting on the plethora of the toothsome provender.     

Glossary

minikin  A very small delicate creature.

incardine  Blood-red.

cowl  The hood or hooded robe worn especially by a monk.

titivate   To make decorative additions to.

gamine  A girl or woman of impish appeal.

erewhile  Some time ago.

jejune Lacking maturity.

hoyden  A high-spirited, boisterous, or saucy girl.

veneration  Profound respect or reverence.

espied  To catch sight of.

discrete  once

trice  an instant

consanguinities  Relatives by blood or by a common ancestor.

comprehended  To take in as a part; include.

enate  A relative on one's mother's side.

predecessor  One who precedes another in time.

possessing  To have as a quality, characteristic, or other attribute.

prosaic  Matter-of-fact.

appellation  A name, title, or designation.

via  By means of.

largess  Generosity of spirit or attitude.

clement  Inclined to be lenient or merciful.

crone  A withered old woman.

procured  To obtain or acquire.

Lilliputian Very small; diminutive.

capote  A long, usually hooded cloak or coat.

vermilion  A vivid red to reddish orange.

capuche  A hood on a cloak.

whence  By reason of which.

winsome  Charming, often in a childlike or naive way.

sobriquet  An affectionate or humorous nickname.

engendered  Brought into existence.

particular  Fixed and distinct from others.

chronological Arranged in order of time of occurrence.

interval  The amount of time between two specified instants, events, or states.

materfamilias A woman who is the head of a household or the mother of a family.

impelled To urge to action through moral pressure.

convey  To take or carry from one place to another.

dosser  A basket.

replete  Abundantly supplied.

alible Having nutrients.

pabulum  A substance that gives nourishment.

potations  Liquid refreshments.

matrilineal  Relating to, based on, or tracing ancestral descent through the maternal line.

predecessor  One who precedes another in time.

forasmuch as  since

valetudinarian  A sickly or weak person.

somatic  Affecting the body.

aforementioned Mentioned previously.

octogenarian  A person between 80 and 90 years of age.

compromised  A concession to something detrimental.

enervated  To weaken or destroy the strength or vitality of.

impuissant  Lack of power or effectiveness.

ergo  hence

delimited  Limited to one state.

supine  Lying on the back or having the face upward.

vinaceous  Having the color of red wine.

bedaubed  To ornament in a showy fashion.

scion  A descendant or heir.

acquiesced  To consent or comply passively or without protest.

extempore  Carried out with little or no preparation or forethought.

forthwith  At once; immediately.

embarked  To set out on a venture.

entrustment  Duty or errand one has been trusted with.

itinerary  A route or proposed route of a journey.

peregrination  To journey or travel from place to place, especially on foot.

venture  To expose to danger or risk.

ratiocinative  Of, relating to, marked by, or skilled in methodical and logical reasoning.

weald  A woodland.

duration  Continuance or persistence in time.

necessitated  Requred.

minute  Exceptionally small; tiny.

analog  A device in which data are represented by continuously variable, measurable, physical quantities.

ingress  A means or place of entering.

sylvan  Abounding in trees; wooded.

milieu  An environment or a setting.

bairn  A child.

discern  To perceive with the eyes or intellect; detect.

pileous  Rough.

quadruped  A four-footed animal.

similitude  A perceptible likeness.

antecessor  One who precedes; a predecessor.

Canis familiaris  The common dog.

incognizant  Lacking knowledge or awareness.

formidable  Inspiring awe, admiration, or wonder.

hispid  Covered with stiff or rough hairs.

miscreant  An evildoer.

iniquitous  Wicked.

flagitious  Infamous.

ingénue  A naive, innocent girl or young woman.

intuit  To know intuitively.

modicum  A small, moderate, or token amount.

disquietude  Worried unease.

trepidation  A state of alarm or dread.

fortuitous  Happening by accident or chance.

happenstance  A chance circumstance.

exemplary  Commendable.

fulgent  Radiant.

diurnal  Relating to or occurring in a 24-hour period.

asseverated To declare seriously or positively.

salutations  A polite expression of greeting or goodwill.

repartee  A swift, witty reply.

wend  To go one's way.

inimical  Unfriendly.

rapscallion  A rascal.

catechized  To question or examine closely or methodically.

actualize  To realize in action or make real.

sojourn  A temporary stay

anile  Of or like an old woman.

cognate  One related by blood.

consign  To deliver.

savorous  Seasoned or flavored.

viands  A very choice or delicious dish.

locus  A place.

purlieu  A place that one frequents.

indubitably  Undoubtedly.

terminus  The final point.

localization  A fixed area.

onerous  Troublesome or oppressive.

subsequent  Following in time or order.

uttering  To send forth with the voice.

vocalization  Speech.

valedictory  A closing or farewell statement.

caitiff  A despicable coward.

retroceded  To go back.

aphotic  Having no light.

boscage  A mass of trees or shrubs.

compendious  Containing or stating briefly and concisely all the essentials; succinct.

confabulation  To talk casually.

dolman  A woman's garment having cape-like arm pieces.

bedecked  To adorn or ornament in a showy fashion.

Adamite  A descendant of Adam; a human being.

absquatulate  To depart in a hurry.

celerity  Swiftness of action or motion.

odious  Arousing or meriting strong dislike, aversion, or intense displeasure.

knave  An unprincipled, crafty fellow.

tarry  To remain or stay temporarily.

trice  A very short period of time.

cogitate  To take careful thought or think carefully about.

machinate  To devise (a plot).

thence  From that time.

compass  To scheme.

Mephistopeles  the devil in the Faust legend to whom Faust sold his soul: mephistophelean adj

cabal  A secret scheme or plot.

denizen  An inhabitant.

arboreal  Relating to or resembling a tree.

pale  The area enclosed by a fence or boundary.

cognizant  Fully informed

deoppilated  Shortened.

aforecited  Previously mentioned.

domicile  A residence.

quiddity  The real nature of a thing.

trajectory  A chosen course.

elected  chosen

soubrette  A young woman.

forsooth  In truth.

facile  easy

labyrinthine  Resembling a labyrinth.

hence For this reason; therefore.

crinite   hairy

reprobate  A morally unprincipled person.

grisard    A gray-headed person.

habitacle   A dwelling place.

ere  Previous to; before.

callow   Lacking adult maturity or experience; immature: a callow youth.

peregrinate   To journey or travel from place to place, especially on foot.

portal  A doorway, an entrance, or a gate, especially one that is large and imposing.

fustigate   To beat with a club; cudgel.

janua   A door.

formidable    Arousing fear, dread, or alarm; formidability or formidableness n

residentiary  One who resides in a certain place; a resident.

suspire  To sigh.

tremulous  Timid or fearful; timorous tremulously.

consanguinean   Consanguineous; as in blood relation.

dissemble  To disguise or conceal behind a false appearance.

varlet  A rascal; a knave.

prevaricate  To stray from or evade the truth.

thence   From that circumstance or source; therefrom.

convey   To take or carry from one place to another; transport.

entity  Something that exists as a particular and discrete unit.

abode  A dwelling place; a home.

effete  Depleted of vitality, force, or effectiveness; exhausted.

encouch  To lay upon a couch.

decumbiture   Confinement to a sick-bed.

predacious  also predaceous  Living by seizing or taking prey; predatory

malfeasance   Misconduct or wrongdoing, especially by a public official  malfeasant n

irrupt  To break or burst in

ingurgitate  To swallow greedily or in excessive amounts; gulp

hoary  Gray or white with or as if with age

dowager   A widow who holds a title or property derived from her deceased husband

abominable  Unequivocally detestable; loathsome: abominable treatment of prisoners

scalawag   Informal a reprobate; a rascal

don  To put on (clothing)

ultrafidian  Going beyond faith

annuitant   One that receives or is qualified to receive an annuity

nocturnal  Of, relating to, or occurring in the night

habiliment  Often habiliments  clothes

voluminous  Having great volume, fullness, size, or number

tuque  A knitted woolen cap in the form of a cylindrical bag often with tapered ends that is worn with one end tucked into the other

ensconce  To settle (oneself) securely or comfortably

ogygian   Very old; in Greek mythology, the ancient king of Boeotia.

mackabroin  An old hag

somnifery  A place of sleep

anon  in a short time; soon

guileless  free of guile; artless

juvencle  a girl or a young woman

divulgate  disclose, reveal 

apprehend   to become conscious of, as through the emotions or senses; perceive

extrinsic  originating from the outside; external

edifice   a building, especially one of imposing appearance or size

pernicious   causing great harm; destructive: pernicious rumors

reprobate a morally unprincipled person

enjoin   to direct or impose with authority and emphasis

transpose   to put into a different place or order: transpose the words of a sentence

corporeity  the state of being material or corporeal; physical existence

confines  the limits of a space or an area; the borders

plebeian   of, belonging to, or characteristic of commoners

bower   a rustic cottage

ingress  a going in or entering

affright  to arouse fear in; terrify

chit  a child

skirl  to produce a high, shrill, wailing tone used of bagpipes

enigmatic  or enigmatical   of or resembling an enigma; puzzling

brobdingnagian   immense; enormous

auditory   of or relating to hearing, the organs of hearing, or the sense of hearing

apparatus  a group or system of organs that collectively perform a specific function or process

protuberate  to swell or bulge

poll  the head, especially the top of the head where hair grows

auscultation  the act of listening

parlance  speech, especially a conversation or parley

cosset  a pet, especially a pet lamb

palter  to talk or act insincerely or misleadingly; equivocate  palterer n

elucidate  to make clear or plain, especially by explanation; clarify

anomaly  one that is peculiar, irregular, abnormal, or difficult to classify  anomalistic   adj

primogenitor  an ancestor or a forefather

prodigious   impressively great in size, force, or extent; enormous: a prodigious storm

ocular  of or relating to the eye: ocular exercises; ocular muscles

orb   a sphere or spherical object

goggle    to roll or bulge used of the eyes

physiognomy   facial features, especially when regarded as revealing character

aver  to affirm positively; declare

descry  to catch sight of (something difficult to discern)

homunculus  a diminutive human being  homuncular, adjective

punctilious  precise; scrupulous

exactitude  the state or quality of being exact

minion   one who is highly esteemed or favored; a darling

enucleate  to explain; elucidate

sphingine  resembling a sphinx

sphinx   a puzzling or mysterious person

antecedent  one that precedes another

cyclopean  vast and rough: massive, huge

extremity  a hand or foot

opine  to hold or state as an opinion

embosom  to enclose protectively; envelop

adroit  dexterous; deft

progeny  one born of, begotten by, or derived from another; an offspring or a descendant

explicate  to make clear the meaning of; explain

therianthropic  being party bestial and partly human in form

harridan   a woman regarded as scolding and vicious

elephantine  enormous in size or strength

denticle  a small tooth or toothlike projection

permeate  to spread or flow throughout; pervade

oral  of or relating to the mouth: oral surgery

orifice  an opening, especially to a cavity or passage of the body; a mouth or vent

brephic  young

numquid  an inquisitive person

adduce  to cite as an example or means of proof in an argument

efficacious  producing or capable of producing a desired effect

gormandize to eat gluttonously; gorge 

sapid  having a strong, pleasant flavor; savory

corporeal  of, relating to, or characteristic of the body

substantial  of, relating to, or having substance; material: substantiality  n

gobbet  a piece or chunk, especially of raw meat

vociferate  to utter (something) or cry out loudly and vehemently, especially in protest

expeditious  acting or done with speed and efficiency

gambado   a leaping or gamboling movement

maleficent  harmful or evil in intent or effect

dastard  a sneaking, malicious coward

manducate   to chew; masticate; eat

woebegone   affected with or marked by deep sorrow, grief, or wretchedness

tellurian  an inhabitant of earth; a terrestrial

surfeit  to feed or supply to excess, satiety, or disgust

scelerate  extremely wicked

picaro  a bohemian adventurer; a rogue

summary  performed speedily and without ceremony: summary justice; a summary rejection: summarily  adv

doss  to go to bed; sleep

propitious  presenting favorable circumstances; auspicious

beneficent  characterized by or performing acts of kindness or charity

nimrod   a hunter

perambulate   to walk about; roam or stroll

vicinal  of, belonging to, or restricted to a limited area or neighborhood; local

imbroglio  a difficult or intricate situation; an entanglement

cark  to burden or be burdened with trouble; worry

perspicacious  having or showing penetrating mental discernment; clear-sighted

paladin  a paragon of chivalry; a heroic champion

transpierce  to pierce; to penetrate through

chaumière  a thatched cottage

peruse  to read or examine, typically with great care

corpulent  excessively fat

oscitancy  the state of being drowsy or inattentive; dullness

pariah  a social outcast

con   to study, peruse, or examine carefully

exigency   a pressing or urgent situation

conjuncture  a critical set of circumstances; a crisis

sapient  having great wisdom and discernment

perspicuity  the quality of being perspicuous; clearness and lucidity

intrepid   resolutely courageous; fearless

factotum  an employee or assistant who serves in a wide range of capacities

erept  to snatch or take away

allagrugous  grim and ghastly

poniard  a dagger typically having a slender square or triangular blade

anatomize  to dissect (an animal or other organism) to study the structure and relation of the parts

execrable deserving of execration; hateful

varlet  a rascal; a knave

disenthrall  to free from a controlling force or influence

felicitous  marked by happiness or good fortune: a felicitous life

adjutorious  helpful

stalwart    one who is physically and morally strong

jugulate  to cut the throat of, kill

inimical  unfriendly; hostile: a cold, inimical voice

malefactor  one that has committed a crime; a criminal

thereupon  directly following that; forthwith

beamish  smiling, as with happiness or optimism

symposiast  one who is part of a drinking party; banqueter

roister  to engage in boisterous merrymaking; revel noisily

banquet  to honor at or partake of a banquet

plethora  a superabundance; an excess

toothsome  delicious; luscious: a toothsome pie

provender  food or provisions