Nursery Rhymes (and songs) for the Erudite

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Scintillate scintillate asteroid minific
Fain I would fathom thy nature specific
Loftily poised in the ether capacious
Strongly resembling a gem carbonaceous
Scintillate scintillate asteroid minific
Fain I would fathom thy nature specific

(author unknown)

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Baa Baa Black Sheep

Blat blat,
Onyx ruminant
Do you possess any cylindrical fibers of keratin?

Affirmative, affirmative
replete ternary satchels

a satchel for my chatelain
a satchel for my abecedarian
and a satchel for the bantam homunculus
who abides down the public passageway.

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Hey Diddle Diddle

Behold the small, carnivorous, domesticated feline and the vielle,
The bovine ruminant traversed over earth's natural satellite in a saltatorial manner;
Upon beholding the phenomena, the diminutive carnivorous domesticated canine cachinnated.
And the shallow concave container absquatulated with the small eating utensil.

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Little Boy Blue

Bantam cyan scion, expel air through your brass instrument,
The domesticated ruminant's in the lea, the bovine ruminant's in the tall annual cereal grass.
Whence is the swain?
Under the hayrick, dormantly abiding.
Will you rouse the swain? Verily nay.
If I arouse him, he will definitely ululate.

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Little Miss Muffet

A diminutive signorina, reposed on a short cluster of elongated strands of grass,
While partaking of her esculent coagulated and uncoagulated lacteal fluids;
An arthropod arrived, who reposed adjacently,
Resulting in her affrightment and abscondment.

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Jack and Jill

A heterogeneous doublet proceeded towards the apex of a natural geologic protuberance,
The purpose of their expedition being the procurement of a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel,
The male member of the team precipitously descended,
Sustaining severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomical structure,
Subsequently the second member of the team performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the same direction taken by the first team member.
(author unknown) 

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